How To Conquer Your Emotions Using The ODE Method
Today, I want to share with you a powerful method called the ODE Method that can help you heal emotional wounds and take back control of your emotional life using mindfulness.
Why Emotions Hurt So Much
The day you were born, you entered this world with a clean slate, like a pure soul carrying no negative judgments or emotions towards yourself or others.
You weren’t born anxious, angry or sad- you were born clear.
But as we grow, life brings emotional experiences that we don’t know how to process. For example, imagine yourself as a 3-year-old kid wanting to play with your dad. You excitedly go toward your dad, who is busy working. Because of his workload, he asks you to play by yourself. You ask him again, and this time he replies angrily with a high pitch that shakes you up. You’ve never felt this “new” emotion that has risen in you before.
It makes you feel rejected and negative, so you go and silently sit in your room, suppressing the emotion because no one told you how to deal with it. That emotion then gets stored in your memory because you didn’t let it out.
A few days later, you go to school, and your art teacher asks you to draw a monkey. You draw a yellow-colored monkey, and the teacher scolds you in front of the class for the ‘rubbish’ you drew. You’re laughed at for drawing a yellow monkey. You feel shame and embarrassment- another suppressed emotion.
You go home, share it with your mother, and your mom tells you, “Boys don’t cry.” And there you go again- another suppressed emotion.
This goes on as you grow up, incident after incident. Some from broken friendships, some from heartbreaks, some from being labeled as careless, some unfortunate. All these experiences create a false identity- a belief that you are unworthy and undeserving of receiving the best in life.
By the time something bad really happens, you become so clueless on how how to handle the situation that deep within, you strengthen the black cloud of your suppressed emotions.
The worst part? These suppressed emotions give rise to loud physical symptoms in the body later in life.
Each time something negative happens, the emotion gets internalized and stored in the body instead of being released. Over time, these stuck emotions build into a pain body, which is nothing but a bundle of unresolved and unreleased emotions inside you.
Do you feel sudden aches and pains which your doctor might have termed as a chronic or lifestyle disorder symptom? Well, guess what? That’s actually stuck emotions inside your body.
It is the pain body, trapped with no way to move out.
The moment you sit with it, breathe it out, or work on ways to process and release it, the pain, no matter how old, will disappear magically.
How to Get Started
Sit quietly and make a list of all the things that trigger you.
Start with the basic things that irritate you on a daily basis- things that you are super sensitive about or keep complaining about. If you’re still clueless, write down a list of names of the people you dislike. Now, in front of each name, write down the qualities or traits that you don’t like in that person. Just one word is enough.
Once done, know that this is your trigger list.
Since you are now aware of your trigger list, it’s time to question each of those beliefs and release them one by one as what you dislike in someone is a reflection of an unhealed part of your identity.
At times, even the smallest triggers can hurt because they poke an old wound, one that was left untreated. For a permanent cure, you have to be brave and scratch that wound again, this time to heal it purposely with love and care.
The ODE Method for Emotional Healing
Since you’ve identified your trigger list, it’s now time to focus on releasing all that is troubling you by giving it an outlet it deserves.
This 3-step mindfulness process helps you gently release old emotional pain:
O – Observe (Be Aware)
When you feel triggered by something, pause and ask yourself:
“What sensations do I feel in my body?”
⭐ Tight chest? Nervous stomach? Heavy heart? Muscle tension? Dry throat? Numbness? Fatigue?
Instead of reacting, just observe like a passive witness:
No judgment. No story. No resistance.
Just, “This is what I’m feeling right now.”
D – Dis-identify (You Are Not Your Pain)
Ask yourself:
“Who is feeling this pain?”
“Is it the real me, or my pain body?”
The moment you ask this, you’ll realize it’s not “you” that’s broken- it’s just an emotion rising from past wounds. Remember, you’re the observer, not the emotion.
By disidentifying your identity from that wound, you create a sense of space to heal.
Just because you suffered from pain doesn’t mean you are that pain.
Let me make it simple: it’s a part of you, not the whole you.
⭐ You like to dance, doesn’t mean you are the dance.
⭐ You like to paint, doesn’t mean you are the paint.
Seems silly, right? That’s exactly how silly it is when we identify ourselves with something so trivial and start living life like that.
You are much more than a pain body- you are caring, loving, talented, worthy, beautiful, genuine- the list is open and endless.
So just repeat after me:
“I am not my pain body.”
E – Embrace (Let It Flow)
Now, the final step is to embrace whatever you’re feeling fully. Instead of pushing it away- sit with it:
⭐ Breathe through the emotion
⭐ Feel it rise and pass without showing any kind of bodily or mental reaction
⭐ Don’t rush. Don’t resist.
This is called the pain body meditation- when you allow emotions to rise and give them a chance to leave the body. The outlet of stuck emotions created through this meditation is not temporary but permanent.
Once you start practicing this meditation, there is a high chance that in a few days you might feel similar sensations rising again. It doesn’t mean your meditation didn’t work, it simply means another layer surfaced for you to release, like the previous one as the mind follows a simple rule- if it is good, let it be more.
The more peace it’ll feel by releasing the stuck emotions, the more it’ll nudge you to release other similar stuck events to feel better. It’s literally about starting.
What Happens When You Practice The ODE Method Regularly
✅ You stop overreacting
✅ You feel lighter, clearer, more peaceful
✅ You reconnect with your authentic self
✅ You gain more confidence
✅ You build high self-worth
And most importantly, you stop carrying emotional baggage that was never truly yours to begin with.
As simple as it sounds, the ODE method and its 3 simple steps are truly powerful in healing any kind of suppressed emotions living in the body.
All you need to do is be mindful, aware, disidentify from the pain body and embrace the real you.
Remember, you are not your pain body.
You are clear. You are whole.
And you can heal.
Now get started with identifying your triggers and start healing them one at a time.
